The brave face- 5-11-2011


Do you see behind the pomp and circumstance?

All the words and smiles meant to distract you and I.

I hear the voice in my head saying, “it’s only a flesh wound, you’re fine.”

But my heart bleeds when I see your name;

The shattered picture of my life rises from the dark corner

And I am forced to feel.

I do well most days; to laugh and love and live

But not when I remember.

I enjoy choosing things for myself and  creating a safe place

But not when I remember.

There are days, weeks even when I feel my life finding a still point, balance

but not when I remember.

How long till the sight of you stops shredding my heart?

How long till the sound of your voice ceases to bring tears to my eyes?

How long till I no longer dream of you?

They think they know me;

So sweet and kind, a nice person.

They see the lie I wish was the truth,

But beneath it and beyond its short expanse

Is the broken part of me, the part I cannot fix.

I pray that time will make my lies truth.

A. Crossley 5-11-2011


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