It’s funny that for the majority of my life I have shared my space on various levels with another person. Growing up I spent all but one year sharing a room with my sister. When I moved to college I lived  in a scholarship house where I lived with 12 girls for 4 yrs and 20 girls for 1yr- that was an experience. Then I moved to NM and lived by myself for 3 1/2 year until I got married. The of course I had a husband for just short of five years.

When life required that I move my wonderful best friend and her husband took me in. I stayed there about three months. Then I moved in with my current roommate Laura. I have only been here two weeks or so. I say all of this to back up the statement that not matter how well you  know or life a person something will always rub because I believe that people need space of their own.

So often in relationships of all kinds we focus on the “togetherness” which don’t get me wrong is wonderful. But in order to support that you must have time apart as well, space to maintain who you are as an individual. I hear this all the time from the mom’s in my life. How they have been swallowed up in the caretaker role but once they do any small thing for themselves it’s like a rejuvenating spring that gives them more to give back to the ones they love.

I know by this point you’re thinking, “so what’s up with the new roommate?” Nothing actually. That is not to say that we do not do things differently or have different ideas about things but I kinda know what to expect by now and the only difference is that I’m not afraid to be clear about what I am and am not willing to do/put up with.

This is a bit dicey when the house is not mine, but it’s not like my rent has no collateral. I think I surprised myself this morning then I was asked to be quit for the couch crasher and said no. Not that I was trying to be load but I have to get up and go to work just like every morning and I’m not going to cater to and unexpected house guest. I wouldn’t expect that if it was my sister on the couch.

So here’s to the ever colorful aspects of life-like living and living with people. They make my world so much more interesting than if I was on my own.


One response »

  1. Togetherness is good, but the only way to stay sane is to get plenty of time apart, too. If more marriages, friends, families understood that the world would be a much more rational place (and lots of people would be less co-dependent)! Good for you for standing up for your right to have a normal morning. I’ve been a couch crasher a few times and nothing makes me feel like I’m imposing more than having people tiptoe around me… I’d rather they act like I’m not even there and go about their routine.

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